Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson has a lot to answer for. Ever since he put his wrestling career in a permanent head lock, and made a remarkable body slam into the film industry, every meathead in Lycra from the world of wrestling fancies themselves as the new Rock on the acting block.

John Cena, often seen as the poor man’s Dwayne Johnson, has done well to also make the considerable leap from ring to screen, but he’s yet to find that breakout role. And unfortunately for him, this one isn’t it either.

There are places, especially in the wilderness, that if a fire breaks out, fire fighters just can’t access. This then becomes a job for Smoke Jumpers; fire fighters especially trained to tackle tricky forest fires.

Heading his particular crew is Superintendent Jake Carson (Cena); a man dedicated to saving lives. As if to prove it, his crew get a call out to a fire that’s broken out in a remote cabin, so they dash out in the helicopter. There they find three youngsters trapped, and Jake bravely dives into the middle of the fire to save them.

Back at base, he attempts to get in touch with their parents, but getting hold of them proves tricky. Jake gets talked into letting them stay at the base for a couple of days, which he agrees to, not realising that neither he or his crew or up to the task of babysitting.

Getting yourself in a family friendly flick is always worth considering, just ask The Rock with his starring role in 2010’s successful Tooth Fairy. So having Cena sign up for this kind of role is no surprise. What is surprising, more shocking actually, is how appallingly bad it is on every front.

To start with, the story has no conviction. Why it’s set in a remote fire station is anyone’s guess, possibly as someone thought it would be the ideal setting for hilarity to ensue. Boy were they wrong. It also feels very dated, especially where the casting of the young children are concerned as they all woefully generic, with the whole experience likely to put them off acting for life, with a bit of luck. Perhaps we have just gotten used to young actors actually being able to act, like the cast of Stranger Things. Whatever school of acting that fine lot went to, this shabby trio didn’t.

And then there’s the script, which is borderline offensive at how poor it is. If there’s one funny line in there, it’s really well hidden, a bit like Cena’s dignity when he’s forced to wear a cropped t-shirt for comic effect.

To that end, you can’t not feel sorry for Cena, and not just for the fact that his skull is at odds with the flesh attached to it. He gives his best, in a really bad film, but there’s really too much bad to even notice. This includes Keegan-Michael Key whose living out his mid-life crisis on screen, having to contend with his other half Jordan Peele carving out an impressive film career, and Key not. And someone please give John Leguizamo a proper job of some kind; he’s a talented actor, deserving of so much more than this.

At one point in the film, Cena delivers what must surely be a credible prophetic line of dialogue: “I’ve got a full audience watching me go down in flames”. Never a truer word.

Much of the blame must land on the shoulders of director Andy Fickman; his attempt at directing is truly amateurish, coming across much like the guy who mistakenly ended up on BBC news being interviewed about something he knew nothing about, but bravely blagging it to save face. But unlike that guy, Fickman saves nothing at all. The fact that he helmed the ‘classic’ Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 should have been a warning sign for someone involved in his hiring.

It’s a shame, as Cena comes across as an affable chap, keen on making an impression. This is the kind of film however, that could well have him crossing his fingers for that coming out of retirement bout as a career insurance policy.

Trying to find a family friendly film to keep everyone quiet for an hour and a half may well be becoming increasingly more difficult in these trying times, but really, you don’t want to get royally burnt with this one.